Growing My Luck

It's official. I'm at a loss for what to do with my life. I'm doing long term substitute teaching for a 7th grade science class now and everyone seems to think I should go in to teaching, the only thing is instead of graduating this December I would have to go back for a while, and that doesn't sound too appealing to me. I haven't been shopping in a really long time and its because my paycheck has been wimpy the past 2 times. But I really need to, my teaching clothes are barely there. And a lot of stuff I can't wear because of the whole dress code thing and then the whole cleavage thing. Because middle schoolers get a little crazy when you show so much. It's a little annoying always having to think what I can and can't wear because of all the crazy rules and it doesn't help that my mother works at the same school that I work at and is always commenting on my wardrobe and how I need to dress correctly for the work place and I am one to say that I dress better than most of the teachers that work here. But as for anything else in my life there isn't a lot other than I'm majorly in love with the man I plan on marrying. We've only been together for a little over a month but I just have that feeling. It's crazy. We have to do the whole secret relationship thing because he is the other assistant coach of the ball team I am coaching while I am teaching. He's also 15 years older than me and has a kid, but for some reason it just feels right. But age is just a number isn't it? I've met his whole family, and absolutley love them. The only thing I'm freaking out about in this relationship is the whole my parents thing. I don't believe the age will matter to them, it will be the whole he's been married before and has a 12 year old daughter. But what is love if it doesn't have its struggles? He loves me. For the first time in my life I actually believe that he does. We have talked about buying land and building a house or finding a good chunk of land with a house already on it. He owns a horse and would like to have more so finding some land is our first thing we want to do. We have plans, we've talked about marriage (it won't be for a while) and kids (again, awhile), what we want to do after I graduate in the fall and where we want to be. He lives about 30 minutes from where I go to school and have my own apartment so whenever given the opportunity I stay with him. This past weekend I came over on Friday and we grilled out that night with some friends of his, Saturday we went to practice together that morning and went out to eat with those same friends down in Clarksville, and Sunday was the best; we woke up, fixed breakfast together, hung out a little watched a movie, and then we went out to the farm where he keeps his horses and we went riding. I was scared out of my mind because I'm pretty sure I have never been on a horse a day in my life. I kept telling him everytime I sneezed I was getting the city out of me. But we rode double so I got to wrap my arms around him all day, and we were out there by ourselves so it was just me and him doing all the farm things. But I love him. And that's all that matters right?